The Flipside of WHY?
The flip side of WHY?
What does that mean and how does it relate to eczema you might be asking? Well, let me explain...
Angry and resentful towards eczema
When I was in the deepest pain during my 4-year bed ridden journey with eczema, I couldn’t imagine going on. I tried to accept my circumstances though I just couldn’t. I was angry and resistant, which caused bottomless suffering. Do you ever watch people’s lives going on around you thriving? Engagements, weddings, job promotions, babies being born, traveling around the globe without a worry... it sank me even deeper into a quicksand of rage and unbearable grief.
Feeling as though eczema had taken value from me
Here’s another one, have you ever entertained the proverbial question, “Why me?” I lied there, asking “Why me?” when I have devoted my life to helping people as well as contributing and creating value for world peace. Did any of it count? So, why me? The most powerless and victim conscious question one can ask. I felt I had no value or worth because of my debilitating condition. Even with the most extraordinary and loving friends, I was bound by my mind thinking my life was done.
Questioning my spiritual practices
When I arrived at the point in which I questioned and doubted my daily spiritual practice of 23 years, I began to lose my will, feeling stuck in time and trapped in my body. Though I still continued with my daily practice because I knew I needed a commitment to something that might revive my spirit, as it felt deadened.
Looking for eczema healing in medications
I often heard that repetition and consistency is what creates new pathways for change to occur. I also heard that if nothing changes then nothing changes. Until then, I had been obsessed with trying to figure EVERYTHING out in my head, looking to medications, steroids, and fingers crossed, potential miracles, that would be the magic bullet train to take me where I wanted to go. I know that meds might be the ideal solution for some, though that hadn’t been my solution during that time. It became clear that what was missing wouldn’t be found outside myself, what it would take was a shift in energy and focus.
Finding my inspiration
So I began to think about what inspired me and shortly after, I realized I was starving for creativity, a tug at my life that had always opened my heart. With this clarity, I shifted from the myopic view that I was seeing through and interpreted that I must use my life and experience to encourage and inspire other people.
It was hard to know what that would look like then, though I was being asked spiritually to go beyond myself and create value from my journey. So in the low of my lows, there I was, holding the golden ticket. I pulled myself up from the bootstraps and began to imagine something BIGGER than me – something that I could contribute in order to make it more inviting for me to stay in the game.
Using my experience to help others
My mantra became, “How can I use my life and my experience in service to others?” I have to acknowledge, however, that when I was in unbearable pain, it wasn’t easy to transcend my own suffering and think about others. Though by living into that question, I understood that everything I was going through couldn’t possibly be only for me.
Understanding the WHY of eczema
Then “my WHY” flipped! Continuing to ask myself, “WHY am I committed to my healing with such conviction?” the reason anchored me: It pains me to witness people suffering and feeling so alone.
Connecting with others
I knew that by overcoming my own struggles, I could deeply connect with others offering hope, light, and inspiration as a result of the teachings, insights, lessons, awareness, and traumas that were continuously unraveling.
Feeling as though I belonged
My creativity opened like the Red Sea parting and I developed a line of cards candles that nurture the human spirit, raising our vibration with inspiration. It gifted me tremendous meaning and purpose as I championed the daily hurdles with a new perspective and a new cause. After having spent a lifetime feeling different and separate, I finally felt a place in the world where I belonged.
Finding my purpose with eczema
Today, even though I still live with the day-to-day obstacles of this condition, I engage in the blessings of everything I have gained through living a life of service. My mission is to support young adults to find freedom within and live their authentic expression in the world. There is absolutely no greater joy than waking up every day to my WHY, working as an Integrative Life Coach, Mindfulness Meditation Teacher, and an Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping) Practitioner. Each of these precious life-to-life connections make the journey all worth it.
What is your WHY?
What is BIGGER than you?
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