The Art Of Surrender

The idea of surrender has always been difficult for me as I am just naturally a fighter. I kind of had to be one to survive all of the challenges and pains throughout most of my life - whether physical, mental, or emotional. I am sure most people can relate to that in some way.

Over the years, though, as I started to learn about healing from within through different modalities, I have learned to practice the art of surrender. And it truly is an art. It is a practice that one must learn to cultivate over time.

Surrendering doesn’t mean giving up

I always had a preconceived notion that surrendering meant giving up. Even giving in to the pain and the suffering. However, I’ve learned that is far from the truth. In fact, surrendering takes strength. It allows us to release control and resistance that we so tightly hold onto.

Understandably, we’d all love to have as much control as possible in our lives. Especially when living with a chronic illness such as atopic dermatitis or topical steroid withdrawal. We start to work so hard on our healing that it can even become an obsession at times.

It's all about balance

Of course, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t do what you can to help yourself and your body and aid in your healing. What I am saying, though, is that there is a time and place for everything, and balance is needed in all areas of life. Part of that is learning when to fight harder and when to surrender and let go.

What does surrendering mean?

Surrendering means letting go of control, letting go of all the scheduling, the planning, the tight grasp we hold onto in our lives in general.

Surrendering means letting go of how we think our lives should be and what they should look like and instead accepting everything as it is and relaxing into it. Dare I even say, embracing it and welcoming the uncertainty and flow of life.

Letting go and feeling everything

Sometimes, the best thing we can do for ourselves is stop trying so hard and stop attempting to “fix” ourselves. Sometimes, the best thing we can do for ourselves is surrender to the pain and just be in it. Allow it to be, and allow ourselves to feel however it is we feel in the moment. We have a right to feel frustrated, to grieve, to be sad, to be angry. All feelings are absolutely justified. Attempting to constantly “fix” that can only do more harm in many cases.

When you can’t surrender, surrender more

It is natural for us to want to fight anything that feels “bad” and unfamiliar. It is natural to feel resistance. However, feelings are always there to be felt, which is the only way they can be healed. So learn to lean into the pain. Learn to sit with it. No matter how uncomfortable it is. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable because that’s where the real change happens. That’s also where the real healing happens.

So when you feel you can’t surrender, when you feel frustrated or stuck in life or feel frustrated with your skin, yourself, or life in general, surrender even more. Release the control, the idea of “perfection,” because you are already whole and perfect just the way you are- even when you are in a flare, even when you are in pain. When you feel you can’t surrender, surrender more.